Sep 24, 2012

To the Person Behind the Blogger

Dear person behind the blogger,

This letter might look a little awkward since the addressee and the author are seemingly the same person. You have been present in this virtual communication space for a long time. You have written over a hundred posts, of which some are found by me also as readable ones, and I don’t hide the truth that I do take time to read some of your posts over and over again simply for the reading cathartic pleasure. 

I can understand that sometimes you feel very dry without having any genuine topics to write upon. I know that hurts a lot. But, the way you pick incidents from the dust-coated folder of memories in your brain, and polish them with your pseudo perfectionist’s touch is appreciable. Some of those memories are nice to read, especially the child hood stories, and your memories on certain girls, and the way you narrate your desire to have them as your girl friends. But frankly, some of such memories and the narratives on them are really ugly. I hope at least from now onwards, you would give more dedication to sorting those memories in order to pick the correct one for this blog.

But, I have some questions to you. I know who you are! But tell me who am I? Am I just your Doppleganger, the ghostly double? Or just a dummy for you to show off? You always use me to glorify yourself. You create an image that is me; you call it Tomz in a narcissistic way, and write hiding behind the safe shades of that image. You remember, there are so many persons who expressed disbelief on the revelation of you as the blogger behind this blog. To cite an example, didn’t that girl once tell you that you don’t look like a blogger? Another one who knew you personally also had exhibited her helplessness on identifying you with the writer as presented in this blog. Could she have taken you and me as two distinct persons? She pleaded, didn’t she?

There are some more close friends you have, who have expressed their irritation over your habit of scrutinizing everything around for topics. You don’t know how much irritating and nauseating is that for others. They say something very personal to you, and the next day it becomes a post in your blog with your valor playing as the background theme. How cunningly you establish yourself as a humble and simple guy gaining applauds from all of your sincere and innocent readers? And you have a great explanation for your self-devotion – that your blog’s name explains it all, that you have explained it in the sub heading, and that you are maintaining a boastful blog. How irksome is that? You should understand that your self-glorification through the blog only will bring head ache. You don’t know you are actually itching your close ones and your trust worthy friends. 

I also know some of your fraudulence. You often use your blog against those who criticize you in real life. I am not citing any example, or posting the links in which you did that. Though apparently you might not tarnish someone openly, but some of your tricky words are hurting to the real persons whom you have presented as characters in your posts. You are doing it purposefully, though you pretend that you did not do anything wrong. But I know, you are doing it intentionally to hurt them, sometimes with the comic portrayal of them, and some other times by rejecting them soullessly.  And those who support you are well portrayed with a bright halo around their heads. I don’t have a better phrase than 'virtual nepotism’ to name your attitude.

I am not criticizing you very much. Not because I am afraid of you. I am not worried that you would desert me, and would put on another image. Because, I know, now your online reputation is based completely on my image. You and I have become inseparable ones. Now there is no you, or no me. Only an admixture of us is present. Neither of us can survive in this virtual world without the mutual support. I know this fact and I also know that you too are completely aware of this. 

We both know that we are the same. So I don’t think I would do emotional vomiting here more on this issue. I hope I will see a better you from the next post onwards, so that you can breathe freedom on losing your image. If you present the real you through me, you might not get so many frowns from your friends, and you will never need to face the 'you a blogger? ’ kind of questioning stares any more.

Sincerely yours,

This post is part of the contest A letter to yourself.. on
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