Jan 31, 2011

Fat boy’s Dilemma

Seeing me working on the laptop late in the night, my room-mate X-EN-Tric, (you know the Decent Proposer?) asked, “New post in the backstage?”

“No, just adding a few more graphics to my new layout,” I replied.

“What’s the status of the last post about your friend, the one-time writer?” he inquired.

“I feel the post reached the people who well-deserved it, even though the readership was less comparing to some other posts,” I said.

“I wonder what will be your next post about”, X-EN-Tric said thoughtfully.

I was also wondering the same. I always wanted to give some tips to the readers regarding the health issues. Quit Smoking! Or Stop Quitting was such an attempt. Coming to the case of the One-time writer, I think there is a scope for a post in the health category. He always was much concerned over his physical appearance.
Thinking so, I suddenly turned and asked my room-mate, “You met the one-time writer right? Do you think he is a little bit overweight?”

“Hmm...I would say he is a normal guy. And if you want to call him fat, yes you can. But in my opinion, if he tries to reduce weight, that would do him only good”, X-EN-Tric said.

Yes. I got the correct answer to my question, I thought. “Now, I remember how I met him for the first time in that boy’s hostel in Trivandrum a few years ago. When I woke up in my first morning in Trivandrum, my first sight was an exercising one-time writer. He was sweating to reduce pounds from his body,” I said.

X-EN-Tric nodded. I felt that he was interested in the way I tell a story, though I stammer a lot. 

I continued, “After we separated from that hostel, whenever we met, he always kept on asking me about the status of his physical feature. Like ‘does he look a little bit leaner then?’ and so on.”

“Hmm...then!,” X-EN-Tric became more curious.

“All the time I tried to convince him that he was not that much fat. Perhaps, I might have been biased while assessing a person by his physique, since mine is lean. So, a person like me would always crave for addition of a few more pounds to his body. Whereas a person like the One-time Writer would look at people of leaner body structure enviously,” I continued.

“Hmmm...that’s true,” X-EN-Tric agreed.

“Last time when we met at that executive bar, he had revealed his new experiments in reducing the fat. He had started to eat only Oats three times a day, since oats is fatless,” I said.

“Oh, is that so?” X-EN-Tric asked. 

“Yes, and I encouraged him saying that the only way to achieve leaner structure as far as he was concerned is to go without food. Since, he is healthy enough; a minor starvation might not directly affect him.” I went on with my narrative, “one-time writer announced that he would do the same to achieve his dream physique and I wished him good luck.”

“Then anything happened?” X-EN-Tric asked curiously. His question made me happy. Usually in my blog posts, I used to be the listener, while my friends speak eloquently. (Of course, the Girl on Crutches’ was different.) Here is a good chance for me to become the speaker. 

“When I called him, he confessed that he failed to keep his new-year resolution. That day itself, he had rice at noon and tea with milk in the morning...” I said.

“What did you feel then,” X-EN-Tric asked. 

“I was very angry. I shouted at him over the phone, using abusive words. I said him, with fat on his body, and disproportionate features, he looks almost like a Hippopotamus. With hanging bulges and fat folds, no girl would fall for him. Don’t even think about marriage, that’s impossible for him.”

“Was he hurt,” X-EN-Tric asked disapprovingly.

“Yes, he was hurt, and that was my intention. All the time, whenever he asked me about his physical stature, I encouraged him by telling that either his posture was okey or he needed to do exercise. If he really wanted to shed his weight, the best way is to pursue means for it. And if he is not sincere to the methods to loose fat, I think, the best thing which I could have done was to criticise him, and that’s what I did,” I said.

“What’s his present condition,” my room-mate asked.

Without replying, I dialled the One-time Writer’s phone number on my mobile. At the other end, I heard my friend responding to my inquiries happily.

He said,” buddy, I reduced my food to oats only. Today I checked the weight, it was two kgs lesser than my last week’s weight.”

I glanced X-EN-Tric smilingly.

Jan 19, 2011

Confessions of a One-time Writer

Last day, when I met my friend of ‘Mid-day Romance’, he took me to a business hotel of the city. Sitting at the plush seatings of the executive bar, while sipping a small beer can that he offered, he heartily apologised to me for the shortcomings happened from his side while treating me. ‘Does just a mouthful of beer affect a man’s nerves this much?, I wondered. 

I replied, “No buddy, I don’t think you did something unfriendly. I don’t feel hurt even if someone behaves me arrogantly, if he is my true friend” 

“I was remembering the days when we started our friendship in Trivandrum. At that time, you were pursuing your studies, and I was undergoing my post-graduate studies in Economics,” thoughtfully he said.

I broke his line of thought, “Wait...wait...are you looking back? If so, I am interested, please continue,” and savoured one more sip from my beer can. 

“I remember the days when I explored the nooks and corners of the Thiruvananthapuram city, attending small and big cultural functions, visiting libraries to libraries, and writing small pieces of articles and novels for magazines and newspapers extracting from my small resource of creativity”, he continued, and of course that long sentence made me think about those days.

“Those were wonderful days! Sometimes, I used to visit you to get creatively inspired, and to hear your eloquent and original points of arguments,” I said.

He said, “Looking back, I feel that I had to stick on to the capital city. But, the financial problems compelled me to undertake some jobs in the marketing of FMCG products. But, thinking now, I feel that I could have pursued my IES dream by taking up any of the job opportunities those came after me in the field of entrance coaching.”

I nodded thinking that his reminiscences could no way make another post for my Vanity Moments.

“But, you found success in the business, so why regret?” I asked.

“That’s true. In the initial days I really struggled to meet the two ends. I had to work hard and sweat off to achieve the monthly targets. I worked in many places, and in all the places, I had clashes with the managers,” he admitted.

“That’s evident from your zodiac sign. People with your zodiac sign do not like the domination of other people,” I said. When he showed curiosity to know more about the traits of his zodiac sign, I tactfully diverted the subject and again trapped him in his own confessions. 

“At that time, a real surge in my career happened. With my earned money, I planned my own product launch,” he said enjoying the memories of his own good old days.

“I remember it,” I said, “When I visited you at Cochin at that time, you had a separate office room adjoining your settlement. It was well furnished one with a posh look. I remember the brochure of your company, with a tagline created by yourself, based on Warren Buffet’s professional success”.

“Yes, that was it. I had advertised in Hindu and in Malayala Manorama. I rented the conference hall of a business hotel and gave an introductory lecture to the first clients of my product. I planned to make some profit from the registration fee. But, that program was a break-even one,” he said.

“Break-what?” I didn’t understand the terminology that he used.

“Break-even! Check the dictionary to know the meaning,” he said slightly irritated.

He continued, “But, however the programme was a success. I got a good number of clients. That was the time you visited me in Cochin at my so-called posh office, travelling all the way from Trivandrum.”

“Your success was enviable, when a person like you becomes an entrepreneur at that young age,” I said.

“Yes, that’s true! But, at that time I did a great blunder because of my lack of discipline,” he said.

“What was it?”

“I began to indulge more and more in luxuries. I spent the evenings watching almost every movie and spending lavishly. When I had to focus more on the development of my business, my attention had diverted to such useless things. As a result, my business began to regress,” he confessed.

“Buddy, I can justify you in all your other shortcomings. But in this case I am helpless,” I said. I remembered another time I visited him at his office. At that time I found myself in his pitifully disordered once posh office. That time, he behaved in a very harsh manner and almost appeared like a mad man, pinching his own hairs.

He agreed that it was his mistake. “I don’t expect anyone would justify me.”

“Perhaps, I may not be lucky enough to have a young entrepreneur friend,” I said.

“But, now I am happy with this new job. When this offer came, I was actually in the middle of all those business calamities. Though initially hesitated, I decided to take up this job,” he finalised his professional life sketch starting from an aspiring writer to a business developer.

While walking outside, I asked him permission to write about him in my blog.

“You write it buddy, great experiences like mine would give your blog a greater charm,” he said.

“Not because that it is great. Currently I am running out of subjects. I have to give something to my readers even if it has nothing. And I think, through your revelations, people might get some good lessons that how a young entrepreneur should not be like” I said hilariously.

“I don’t think you insulted me,” he said and smiled in his natural way as if someone tickled him.

Jan 3, 2011

Missing Thiruvananthapuram

A few weeks ago, when Ronnie Raj (the filmy friend in Online Detective and the Girl on Crutches) called me from the Capital city, I asked him in a tone of surprise, that what was he doing in Thiruvananthapuram. He said, “buddy, did you forget? It is now the International Film Festival. Are you not attending this time?”

Sadly I realized, yes, I was missing the film festival for the first time in the last five years. My shift to the Cochin city has attributed such irreparable losses to my life. I truly liked the kind of exotic atmosphere brought to Trivandrum through the third world films, especially, Latin American, Iranian etc, during the film festival time. Ronnie Raj or some other friends used to be with me in such situations. We used to discuss after watching every film, about varying topics, ranging from the camera treatment used, visual appeal, scripting techniques and the beauty of the heroine to the usual hot, steamy scenes.

During night times, I accompanied Ronnie Raj to one of the ugliest and most crowded bars of the city, where his childhood mate was working as a supplier. Though unwillingly, I used to give him company during his visits to the bar, passing the dirtiest parts of the city and climbing the broken and ruined steps to end up around a table in perished condition. As soon as the childhood friend sees us, he used to serve us with one or two pegs of his favourite liquor. Encouraged by Ronnie Raj, I also used to consume one or more pegs. After that I used to drive my sincere bike with him through the unoccupied city roads in the darkest nights aiming his hotel room. On the way, when seeing police jeeps patrolling, terrified, my friend would clutch me on shoulders and would say me in a shivering voice, “Don’t panic; these are simple cases; why are you speeding your bike up?” 

Recently, the director, who appeared in one of my previous posts titled ‘The Villain’, contacted me on phone. He wanted to know the address of the place - for his friend to dwell in a few days - where I spent some of my good times in Trivandrum. Over the phone I said him to go forth through the lane, till he reaches the end of it. I could hear him breathing, and I guessed that he was walking briskly through the same road, where my sincere bike covered 20,000 and 30,000 kms. When the director reached the end of the lane, I asked him to turn left. He is listening to me, I thought; and he is seeing the paths ahead. Does that mean I am seeing my favourite locations through his eyes? 

Following my directions, the director reached at the gate of the house to which I bid farewell just one month before. It was where the incidents described in the tale of the Love Messenger took place. Some more incidents like, the Science of Horoscopes and  the Inception Experience also happened at the same house. I was about to ask the director the new occurrences of the place, but he abruptly cut the phone. 

Now I miss many things, my usual evening visits to the Shankhumugham beach, the setting sun, solitary benches of the park, hasty ride through the streets, creative friends, the familiar paths, familiar faces, tea shops, the bakery at the second floor, theatres, teasing talks, everything. I don’t know how much time it would take to build up such emotional tie ups in this new city. 

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